Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
