Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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