Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Every concussion has its silver lining
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
