i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
