it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I have demons in me.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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