i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
