I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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