those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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