My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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