Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
