wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
