So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
