I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
