Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
