So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
