shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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