Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Randomize
