brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
