return my video game
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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