big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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