one word: firstdatebathroomanal
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
