I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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