life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
