If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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