i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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