Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”