I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
