I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
