yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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