): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
