I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
he fucked my hip out of place.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
True strength comes from lack of pants
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