doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
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