I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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