...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
