We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
