My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
