He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize