We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
