She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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