I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize