But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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