you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
