So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize