Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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