We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Less talking, more tequila
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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