You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Randomize
