I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
