Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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