What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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