it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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